the soup of the day is garlic garden greens w/ a lil bit of cream

A customer leaves & about 6oz of perfectly good hanger steak is left behind on her plate. As the bartender clears the table & sees the thick slices of bloody meat, she says "this really hurts me to see. It makes me so sad, I don't even want to look at it."
Surprised, I ask "ohhh- you're a vegetarian?!"
"No noo" she says, "& it's mediuummm rare! I just hate to throw it away, but I'm not a picker. I 'm not like thaat.. but it's tempting... but I'm not like that."

ohh, that's a good number.

in the past, making decisions has been a cause of tension for me.
it's been so easy for me to get wrapped up in the mind swirls of pros & cons & possible outcomes & what does it even matter? yaddah yaddah..
even the small decisions, like what to eat for lunch, could take me as much time as permitted.

i've been practicing the bold art of trusting my instincts, my initial impulses, my gut, my heart, my angels... trying to let go of control & into the flow.

i waited til the market was about to close before i went to buy my groceries. i was hoping to stay under $50. i stormed through the place in about ten.fifteen minutes (which is quick for someone with a nickname of slowelle).. not thinking about what was on sale & prices & checks & balances & all those pros & cons & possible outcomes & what does it even matter? yaddah yaddah

i was thinking, no time to calculate- what do i need? what do i want? i hope i stay under $50.

i left with everything i needed, almost everything i wanted, & a miraculous bill of $49.31.
oh, & a mysterious bonus i didn't notice til i got home- two free delicious energy bars.

i don't think [it could have gone any better had i used my mind].

these daze, i'm seaing

perfect fits

upward spirals

synthesis

messengers

sensory feasts

two sides of the same coin
yin to the yan

flipping the coin
because i can

they say there's a grand cross in the sky..


all i know is now.